Saturday, January 17, 2009

Cut it out!

Maybe I was just tired from a busy week. Maybe I just didn't know what to expect, but at first I was disappointed with the report I got yesterday from my doc. The tumor board had met, and their recommendations pointed toward surgery. Isn't this what I want?

The problem is, they were not saying the tumor is dead and has started to shrink, so it's safe to take it out now. A good chunk of the tumor is dead, but it is still a formidable mass, and even a bit larger. And, like a volcano, it is still active at the top.

Dr. Sarwar's words were consistent with what I have been feeling. I can tell it is larger, and I can feel twinges sometimes - like a muscle clenching - in the area where cancer cells are alive. The doctor is great at speaking straight; he could not say whether chemo was responsible for the dead tissue or whether it resulted from a lack of blood flow to the lower part of the tumor.

Radiation was ruled out as a strategy to try to shrink the tumor, for which I am thankful. Trying a different chemotherapy which would require hospitalization was mentioned but not strongly pushed. That's fine, too. The question now is finding the right surgeon, possibly at a major cancer center in NYC or Houston.

It helped that Dr. Brenda called last night. She didn't mince words that the surgery would be difficult and risky, but she has not taken herself out of consideration for the job. And she supports my quest for other opinions.

The challenge for coming weeks will be researching my options and landing on the right choice. I'm feeling better now about moving closer to surgery.

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